Small Talk: Meaningless or Purposeful?

I have to be honest, I have always detested small talk. Ok, maybe that's too strong of a word but it is definitely not one of my favorite things to do. Why? I've always thought it was pointless. Those conversations you feel like you just have to have because you are stuck walking in the same direction as someone you barely know, sharing an elevator, or waiting in line and not wanting to feel the awkward silence that sometimes happens. 

We all experience it.

And of course everyone talks about the weather and sports and the casual "How have you been?" when in reality, we really don't care. We just want to feel up the time and space and pretend like the person standing next to us is important.

 Well, I'm guilty as usual.

I had this experience this past week at work. A gentleman I had never met before was kind enough to help me bring cases of water to my car. We had to walk a little ways to my car and all I could come up with is "It sure is hot." Yeah I thanked him and told him to "Have a nice day" but I cringed after I said that. Because I really didn't care if he had a nice day. I was just saying it because that's just what you say. And he just nodded so I felt he knew I didn't mean it.

It bothered me throughout the day about the carelessness I had with that man and those 5 minutes I had with him and got me to start rethinking my hate relationship with small talk. I mentioned in another post about making every minute count with another person. I think we can do that in small talk. We don't have to talk about the weather and what was on TV last night all the time. I'm not saying we have to tell our life stories in five minutes with a complete stranger, but I think we can and should engage in meaningful conversation during short periods of time.

If I could do it all over again, I would introduce myself to him and ask him about himself. I would thank him for being a volunteer for our agency and ask him what he likes about the agency. Basically I would have used that time to show that I actually care about who he is and not just what he's doing for me. I would get to know him as much as I could so if I ever saw him again, I would remember who he was and something unique about him. I would be able to greet him by name. And when I would tell him to have a nice day, I would mean it because I know who he is and I genuinely want the best for him. Sounds sappy, but aren't we supposed to love and care about everyone, even complete strangers?

So I believe small talk can be purposeful.

Matter of fact, let's stop calling it "small talk." Let's call it something like "Purposeful Chats" or "Meaningful Convo."  To me "small talk" has a bad connotation because by my actions I'm showing that the person is "small" because I don't know them, therefore the conversation can be "small."

No person is small in God's eyes so no person will be small in my eyes.

Love this song. Fits so well here.